So much has happened for me in 2013 that it was difficult to decide on one particular theme. I made a couple of drafts but was not moved to publish them, not that they weren’t good enough, they just did not reflect 2013’s one definitive message for me. But this morning I jolted out of bed inspired to write, so here goes!
I first became aware of my false self of “I AM ALONE” at Dr. Marc Gafni’s Awakening Your Unique Self Course I took in April 2013. Prior to that I was unable to pin down where the sadness and pain was coming from. I know and feel without a trace of doubt my husband, daughters, my mom and siblings love me very much. Yet there was a void and restlessness that notoriously nagged at me.
It was a relief and a HUGE AHA to finally identify the false core belief holding me hostage and at last consciously release it and discover my True Self.
Thus began a deeper journey to Awakening… to Unique Self… to Oneness… to the Unique Gift only I can give which is just waiting to be unwrapped and given selflessly to the world. Thus began as well my journey as an Awakening Coach.
Clarity is power. On the last day with Dr. Marc Gafni, I became very clear what my purpose is. I was so moved and inspired that I declared it out loud that was heard, witnessed, and supported by my beloved mentor and all his other students.
Publicly declaring my purpose and desire to serve and give back set everything in motion. My life took on a whole new meaning and direction. All I had to do was say YES to the synchronicity and synergy happening for me all around me. All of a sudden I am surrounded with beautiful souls, feeling connected and on purpose.
Within a couple of weeks I was at Tony Robbins’ Unleash the Power Within and shortly thereafter, among heart-centered entrepreneurs at Maggie Ostara’s the Next Great Visionary Business Contest, to name a few life-changing, whirlwind events that catapulted my growth exponentially.
I remember at one point during the NGVB contest, back in September, the pangs of “I am alone” hit me very hard. I was elated to see many people support me, but deflated when family members’ response seemed lackluster. But I was done feeling separate, disconnected and misunderstood. I don’t live there anymore.
I hemmed and hawed at first, but I got there. It was not easy not to go back to old pattern. The bottom line is, I couldn’t pretend anymore I was a superwoman who can do it all alone. So I spoke up and got real and vulnerable.
Turns out, my mom had no internet, one sister was on a cruise, another on a concert tour, and another bothered with cataract. Silently to myself I was like, “Are you kidding me? You all just happen to be unavailable at the same time?” Funny how the Universe tests us and gives us lessons on exactly what we need to work on.
So glad I chose not to habitually react, get defensive,or worse, retreat and isolate. I could have made so many assumptions, create many stories in my head to justify my false belief that I was better off alone. But I didn’t.
Instead, I ripped open and apart the lie once and for all to really see it for what it was – an illusion. Nothing but a distortion. It was time to embody the truth. That I am not alone. I never was and never will be. I am one with all there is. And feeling this truth deep within and coming into awareness every moment is utterly liberating.
The pain of yearning was so great… the longing for Higher Truth was much too much to ignore. The only way to freedom is to answer the deep calling of the soul.
Oneness. Freedom. Now I feel so connected with everyone. This is 2013’s gift to me, and with it comes courage to be a gift to the world. To live my bigger purpose and mission in life.
Thank you 2013. Thank you for new friends, deeper connections, stronger relationships. Thank you, Date with Destiny Palm Springs December 2013!!! Anthony Robbins, I love you. You made sure I divorced my story and marry the truth not just intellectually, emotionally or intuitively, but by making me feel it in my body and release the old bullshit story from a cellular level. Thank you!!!
Here’s me with amazing new friends from all over the world. I love you guys. Thank you!!!
A great big THANK YOU to my community of coaches and heart-centered visionaries and entrepreneurs. My coaches, teachers and mentors. You lift me higher and higher every single day. You guys freaking rock!
And most of all my loving family. You fill up my life with so much love, joy and happiness.
Guess I was hanging on and reluctant to let 2013 go… But after all that fun and enlightenment, I am ready and willing for so much more.
Hello 2014. You and I are going to AWAKEN POSSIBILITIES!!! Let’s go.